children's obedience to parental instruction

How To Make Your Children Obey Your Instructions With Joy

Children wants and need to be instructed and disciplined in a way that the consequences and expectations are clearly communicated and consistently applied; this enables children obedience to parental instructions easy. In this blog post you are going understand:

  • What genuine training, discipline and instructions are all about.
  • The building blocks of effective parental instructions.

A. Definition of terms

  • Training: to form thoughts and habits through practice. This must be done intentionally.
  • Discipline:  the state of order and children obedience to parental instructions; to correct or chastise. This must be motivated by love.
  • Instructions: the act of teaching information.

A. The building block of effective instructions:

  • This parenting model includes three core building blocks along with three modifiers.
  • The modifiers tell us the spirit in which the building block needs to be applied.
  • The building blocks are what we DO and the modifier describes HOW it is done.

B. Building Block 1: Communication That Commands.

  • The building block, Communication, forms the basis of all relationships.
  • The modifier, Command, refers to the ability to speak or direct with specific authority.
  • Parents are to be seen as trusted leaders.
  • For your communication to be commanding, you must be an authority figure in the home.
  • Say what you mean and mean what you say: Below are four aspects of communication to ask yourself, is your communication:
  1. Clear: direct, unambiguous, plain, and free of abstraction?
  2. Concise: specific and intentional vs. loud and long?
  3. Commanding: presented with authority and assertive when it needs to be (volume has its place in military training).
  4. Controlled: reflects gentleness, kindness, and respect.

C. Building Block 2: Consequences With Modifier Of Compel.

  • The building block, Consequences, teaches about the effects and outcomes of one’s behavior, whether positive or negative.
  • The modifier, Compel, refers to the ability to convince others of the need for change.
  • Consequences should be powerful enough to compel a child to reestablish self-control in a present situation.
  • Consequences that are purposefully unpleasant can help the child recall from memory what happened the last time he or she disobeyed.
  • Remember the Spank Six Point Plan:
  1. Only as a clear response to rebellion of authority (Not for accidents or lack of character development.)
  2. Check our hearts, motives, circumstances.
  3. Remove to a private place if possible.
  4. Offense clearly discussed and acknowledged.
  5. Spank applied under control and emotions in check.
  6. Pray, Assure, Restore. (Do not apologize for the consequence.)
  • Purpose in consequences help your child to see you have their best interest in mind.
  • Children will often rebel against consequences, but there is a part of their heart that will find an assurance in knowing they are NOT in charge.

D. Building Block 3 : Consistency With Modifier Of Confirming.

  • The building block, Consistency, allows parents to provide children with a predictable set of guidelines and principles for living that make children’s obedience to parental instruction easy.
  • The modifier, Confirming, refers to the ability to instruct with assurance and truth.
  • Consistency is deeper than just “doing the same thing over and over.” It is a steadfast adherence to the same principles or course of action in an intentional parenting plan.
  • There is a blessing when agreement and harmony guide the parents (father and mother) on how instruction communication, and consequences are applied.
  • We must be consistent in attitude (i.e., the way we think, composure,  being confident that we are doing the right thing).
  • Inconsistent parenting: Prevents discipleship, Causes confusion, Breeds exasperation/anger in children.
  • We are confirming when we reflect a definite, assurance that our composure and attitudes are establishing a measure of order and truth.
  • Consistency in these areas confirms parent’s values, vision, and determination to stay the course for their child’s benefit.

Modeling a willingness to admit mistakes and take a different approach enhance children obedience to parental instructions.